Thursday, November 01, 2007
Im too tired to think about anything....
Im feeling very down now.... just received a msg from my teacher that he wont be teaching me for the last lesson... and i was totally upset.. cos i wanted to play a song for him as a farewell piece.... time flies very fast... i remembered the time when he called me for audition to nafa as bassist.... and the day when we ate ramen together... and listened to stories about basses...
now... just a msg.... he has left.... im very upset.....
other than that..... i've too many things to upset about....
for chingay.. i'll be placed as reserve cos of my commitment.... every wed night i'lll be having rehearsals.. WHICH I DIDN REALLY WANT TO CLASH!! im feeling so FRUSTRATED !!!! i was looking forward to participate so much..... im pissed with them !!! i really am.... which leads me to help them reluctantly in the future !!!
thats one..
next is that my composition.... i've really put alot of my heart into it.... cos its what im feeling for past few weeks... and i've my best by composing only using 5 NOTES...... just 5.... pentatonic scale.. but it really seems hard to perform it.... im really trying to accomodate everyone so that they can play them even without much practice as everyone is superb busy playing for one another's piece... i understand...
thats two..
ATCL piano is on 22 nov.. and dbass exam is on 21 nov.... how great!!!.... im juggling two things at a time... and i dont wanna fail both of them..... cos i've been putting alot alot of efford for pass everyone of them.... ATCL fees is FUCKING MADNESS.... 700++.... just to get a piece of cert....... if i fail dbass exam.... i have to retain... and have to spend 2000+ for another year again.. i dont wanna feed the stupid school with money again... and get ill treated by FUCKIN vODK@ H@RTUNG..... he's the most motherfucking piece of shit i've ever encounter in my life !!! he deserves to be condemned.. and i have my limits of the ill treatment that he gave me.... and i tried to fit his standard WHICH IT'LL TAKE ME abt 10 YEARS for that ?
thats three..
i dont feel like doin my work now.... even though tomorrow is the submission... im gonna break down soon...
i actually felt like suiciding? which is madness...
its just two more days, why cant you wait? why cant you understand the situation that im undergoin? its drivin me crazy to the core!!!.. i cant abandon my academics after how much efford i've been putting since 2 years ago... pls understand... its not like i want for last min changes?
